Boro Prodanic
Počasni global moderator
kapetan bojnog broda
 Offline
Gender: 
Posts: 15 265
|
 |
« Reply #12855 on: January 29, 2014, 07:56:35 am » |
|
[ Attachment: You are not allowed to view attachments ] [ Attachment: You are not allowed to view attachments ] [ Attachment: You are not allowed to view attachments ] [ Attachment: You are not allowed to view attachments ] [ Attachment: You are not allowed to view attachments ]
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
MOTORISTA
Počasni global moderator
kapetan bojnog broda
Offline
Gender:
Posts: 62 007
|
|
« Reply #12856 on: January 29, 2014, 09:59:00 am » |
|
[ Attachment: You are not allowed to view attachments ]
[ Attachment: You are not allowed to view attachments ]
[ Attachment: You are not allowed to view attachments ]
[ Attachment: You are not allowed to view attachments ]
[ Attachment: You are not allowed to view attachments ]
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
MOTORISTA
Počasni global moderator
kapetan bojnog broda
Offline
Gender:
Posts: 62 007
|
|
« Reply #12857 on: January 29, 2014, 09:59:57 am » |
|
[ Attachment: You are not allowed to view attachments ]
[ Attachment: You are not allowed to view attachments ]
[ Attachment: You are not allowed to view attachments ]
[ Attachment: You are not allowed to view attachments ]
[ Attachment: You are not allowed to view attachments ]
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
MOTORISTA
Počasni global moderator
kapetan bojnog broda
Offline
Gender:
Posts: 62 007
|
|
« Reply #12858 on: January 29, 2014, 10:01:28 am » |
|
[ Attachment: You are not allowed to view attachments ]
[ Attachment: You are not allowed to view attachments ]
[ Attachment: You are not allowed to view attachments ]
[ Attachment: You are not allowed to view attachments ]
[ Attachment: You are not allowed to view attachments ]
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
MOTORISTA
Počasni global moderator
kapetan bojnog broda
Offline
Gender:
Posts: 62 007
|
|
« Reply #12859 on: January 29, 2014, 10:02:17 am » |
|
[ Attachment: You are not allowed to view attachments ]
[ Attachment: You are not allowed to view attachments ]
[ Attachment: You are not allowed to view attachments ]
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
pvanja
kapetan korvete
Offline
Gender:
Posts: 6 288
|
|
« Reply #12860 on: January 29, 2014, 12:52:38 pm » |
|
Mujo je bio prilično iritantan optimist koji stalno govori "Moglo je bit' gore!".
Dojadilo to njegovim jaranima, pa odluče da mu ispričaju priču koja će ga odvratiti od toga.
Dođe Haso do Mujinog stola u birtiji i krene:
- Mujo, jarane, je's čuo za tragediju sinoć kod Ibrahimovića?
Mujo odmahne glavom:
- Jok, šta je bilo?
Haso nastavi:
- Vratio se Ibro kući, ulovio ženu s ljubanikom u krevetu. Ubio ih oboje, zapalio kuću pa ubio sebe!
Mujo opet odmahne glavom:
- Moglo je bit' gore!
Haso poludi i izdere se na Muju:
- Ti nis' normalan, bolan, kako je moglo bit gore!?
Mujo slegne ramenima:
- Da je Ibro naletio prekjučer, ubio bi mene!
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
Boro Prodanic
Počasni global moderator
kapetan bojnog broda
Offline
Gender:
Posts: 15 265
|
|
« Reply #12861 on: January 30, 2014, 09:36:35 am » |
|
[ Attachment: You are not allowed to view attachments ] [ Attachment: You are not allowed to view attachments ] [ Attachment: You are not allowed to view attachments ] [ Attachment: You are not allowed to view attachments ] [ Attachment: You are not allowed to view attachments ]
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
Boro Prodanic
Počasni global moderator
kapetan bojnog broda
Offline
Gender:
Posts: 15 265
|
|
« Reply #12862 on: January 30, 2014, 09:37:54 am » |
|
[ Attachment: You are not allowed to view attachments ] [ Attachment: You are not allowed to view attachments ] [ Attachment: You are not allowed to view attachments ] [ Attachment: You are not allowed to view attachments ] [ Attachment: You are not allowed to view attachments ]
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
motorista 57 klasa
Prijatelj foruma
poručnik korvete
Offline
Gender:
Posts: 3 080
Да ли ћемо још коме сметати зато што смо своји?
|
|
« Reply #12863 on: January 30, 2014, 09:44:27 am » |
|
[ Attachment: You are not allowed to view attachments ]
[ Attachment: You are not allowed to view attachments ]
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
Boro Prodanic
Počasni global moderator
kapetan bojnog broda
Offline
Gender:
Posts: 15 265
|
|
« Reply #12864 on: January 30, 2014, 02:08:04 pm » |
|
Bio pozar u karton sitiju i ciga prijavljuje panduru sta je sve izgorelo:
-lcd televizor!
Pandur napise.
-bosch masina za ves!
Pandur napise.
-bosch pegla!
Pandur ga gleda pa napise.
-bosch masina za sudove!
Pandur popizdi pa mu kaze:
-Ajde bre cigo ne lazi toliko, pa ti nisi ni struju imao ovde dovedenu!
-E da. Dobro me podseti gos'n pandur, i agregat honda na dizel....
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
kumbor
Stručni saradnik - opšti
kapetan bojnog broda
Offline
Gender:
Posts: 17 603
|
|
« Reply #12865 on: January 30, 2014, 11:29:42 pm » |
|
...
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
Bozo13
Stručni saradnik - KoV
kapetan bojnog broda
Offline
Gender:
Posts: 16 530
|
|
« Reply #12866 on: January 31, 2014, 07:27:40 am » |
|
Aktualna..
[ Attachment: You are not allowed to view attachments ]
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
Bozo13
Stručni saradnik - KoV
kapetan bojnog broda
Offline
Gender:
Posts: 16 530
|
|
« Reply #12867 on: January 31, 2014, 07:33:36 am » |
|
Posle dužeg boravka u Francuskoj Mika se vratio u svoju Cigan malu i zadovoljno se baškari u krevetu sa ženom posle dobrog seksa.
• Jel' bre, Miko, kako se ova ženska stvar kaže na francuski? - upita njega žena.
• Moni.
• A kad je malo veča?
• Monika.
• A kad je velika k'o moja?
• Harmonika, mindzu ti jebem ciganjsku!
- Kako se zove Ciganski turnir u tenisu?
- ROMAN GARROS
Zaboleo Cigu stomak pa ode kod doktora.
Opipava mu doktor stomak i pita:
- "Kakva ti je velika nužda?"
- "Velika, brate, velika da nije ne bih ni došao."
- "Ne pitam te to, nego kakva ti je stolica?"
- "Drvena, a i stara, vala propala skroz."
- "Ama čoveče razumeš li ti mene, koliko puta ideš napolje?"
- "Od kada svane i ne ulazim u kuću do uveče."
- "G0vno Cigo, kako ti je g0vno?"
- "Eee, to još gospon doktor nisam probao."
Skršio se Cigo sa kolima, jedva živ ostao, sakupili ga u dijelovima i unose u hitnu.
Pogleda ga dežurni doktor i prodere se:
- "Sestro, instrumente!"
A Cigo će:
- "Pa đe sad ovakav da Ti sviram doktore, ljubim ti karakter?!"
Ciga u vojsci, sedi na klupi u kasarni i zamisljeno gleda u daljinu. Nailazi porucnik, a Ciga ga ne primecuje. Oficir mu se obrati:
- A ti mene ne jebes ni dva posto, je li Cigo?
- Jebem gos'n porucnice, kako da ne jebem, samo vas nisam vid'o .
Dolazi ciga na autobusku stanicu i pita jednog službenika :
- Kume, daj dve kifle, ljubim te u oko.
- Nisam ja pekar prijatelju, ja sam dispečer!-
Dobro, oćeš onda dispečeš jednu?
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
Bozo13
Stručni saradnik - KoV
kapetan bojnog broda
Offline
Gender:
Posts: 16 530
|
|
« Reply #12868 on: January 31, 2014, 07:46:52 am » |
|
*Farbanje prozora*
Poslali Muju da ofarba nekoliko prozora.
Vraća se on nakon završenog posla, pa pita:
- Treba li ofarbati i okvire?
Mujo sretne Hasu i zaprepašćen njegovim izgledom reče mu:
- Zaboga, Haso, kako to izgledaš?! Lice ti je puno ogrebotina i masnica.
Još i posrćeš! Hajde, odvest ću te kući!
- Jesi li poludio?! Pa od kuće i dolazim.
Dođe Perica iz škole i kaže tati:
- Tata, tata, rekao mi je Ivica da sam peder!
- I? Jesi ga udario šakom u glavu? - upita ga otac.
- Ma nisam tata!
- A zašto nisi?
- Pa sladak je!
Hvali se Englez kako je ženi za rođendan kupio Porsche koji do stotke ide
za sedam sekundi.
Talijan kaže:
- A ja sam svojoj kupio Ferrari, on za pet sekundi ide do sto.
Bosanac sluša pa reče:
- Ja sam svojoj Fati kupio poklon koji za jednu sekundu ide do sto.
Englez i Talijan će uglas:
- Ma, nemoguće, pričas gluposti, to ne postoji! A što si joj to kupio?!
- Vagu - reče Bosanac.
Posljednjim snagama brodolomac se dovuko do obale.
Izmoren ali i sretan, legne na plažu, kad li se kraj njega stvori njegova
žena i počne vikati:
- Pa di si ti do sad? Brod je potonuo još jučer!
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
Boro Prodanic
Počasni global moderator
kapetan bojnog broda
Offline
Gender:
Posts: 15 265
|
|
« Reply #12869 on: January 31, 2014, 11:37:57 am » |
|
[ Attachment: You are not allowed to view attachments ] [ Attachment: You are not allowed to view attachments ] [ Attachment: You are not allowed to view attachments ] [ Attachment: You are not allowed to view attachments ] [ Attachment: You are not allowed to view attachments ]
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
