Kuzma®
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« Reply #930 on: March 25, 2015, 10:01:05 pm » |
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MOTORISTA
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« Reply #931 on: March 26, 2015, 02:35:27 pm » |
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MOTORISTA
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« Reply #932 on: March 26, 2015, 02:36:44 pm » |
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Bozo13
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« Reply #933 on: March 26, 2015, 03:15:12 pm » |
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MOTORISTA
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« Reply #934 on: March 28, 2015, 04:19:06 pm » |
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MOTORISTA
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« Reply #935 on: March 28, 2015, 04:20:08 pm » |
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MOTORISTA
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« Reply #936 on: March 28, 2015, 04:21:21 pm » |
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MOTORISTA
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« Reply #937 on: March 28, 2015, 04:21:50 pm » |
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MOTORISTA
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« Reply #938 on: March 29, 2015, 05:33:43 pm » |
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MOTORISTA
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« Reply #939 on: March 29, 2015, 05:34:32 pm » |
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MOTORISTA
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« Reply #940 on: March 31, 2015, 08:16:15 am » |
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pvanja
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« Reply #941 on: March 31, 2015, 03:29:06 pm » |
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U Japanu se zbog sramote oduzima sebi život.
U Srbiji se postaje poznat.
Moj frižider misli da sam ja Jehovin svedok. Stalno sam mu na vratima.
Nominujem sebe za Nobelovu nagradu za mir, jer ovo trpljenje sranja u Srbiji neko mora da nagradi.
Da li sam čitao "Idiota"?
Šta čitao, glasao, jbt.
Majka:
- Sine, zašto se u poslednje vreme ne družiš sa Markom?
Sin:
- Pa, jel bi se ti družila sa nekim ko pije, puši i drogira se?
Majka:
- Naravno da ne bih.
Sin:
- Pa eto vidiš, neće ni on.
Jedini ispravan odgovor na žensko pitanje "Jel sam se ugojila?" je da se praviš mrtav.
Razgovaraju dva patka pedofila. Pita jedan:
- Da li bi sad mogao da kresneš nešto mlado?
A drugi odgovara:
- Dapače.
Naučno je dokazano da je najbolji lek protiv depresije ŠETNJA. Jer, ako budete dovoljno dugo šetali, izaći ćete iz ove zemlje.
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Kuzma®
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« Reply #942 on: March 31, 2015, 05:58:45 pm » |
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Pesimista: Ne može biti gore.
Optimista: Može, može.
Pita majka sina:
- Sine, drogiraš li se ti?
- Ne, otkud ti to?
- Rekla mi ptičica.
- Ma nemoj, ti pričaš sa pticama i onda se ja kao drogiram!
- Tata, šta je to abortus?
- Pitaj sestru!
- Ali tata, ja nemam sestru!
- O tome ti i pričam!
Dosao Cigo kod doktora i žali se na uho.
Doktor pita
- Kakvi su ti simptomi?
A Cigo odgovara
- Simptomi su mi odlični. Najviše mi se sviđa Bart!
Lik u bolnici leži i treba da mu odseku noge. Doktor ga uspava i odseče mu noge, ali odseče mu i ruke.
Pacijent se budi iz anestezije i vidi šta se desilo pa pita doktora:
- Pa dobro noge što ste mi amputirali, ali što i ruke ?
Doktor:
- Ti bi to čačkao, to bi se inficiralo i šta smo onda uradili?
Šta je vrhunac krize?
Kad uđeš u kinesku radnju i kažeš:
- Ništa ništa, samo razgledam.
Komandant dobio naređenje da saopšti vojniku Petroviću da mu je majka umrla, ali su mu skrenuli pažnju da mu to kaže na fin način. I tako došao komandant u četu i postrojio ih:
- Svi koji imaju majku neka iskorače... A gde si ti pošao Petroviću?!
Trči mali Ciga do mame:
- Mamo, mamo, 'naš š'a je ćale uzeo?
Š'a je uzeo?
- Uzeo da se kupa!
Dečko priznao devojci da je voli, a ona će njemu:
- Imaš li ti dva Mercedesa?
- Nemam.
- A kuću na dva sprata?
- Nemam.
- Onda neće biti ničeg između nas!
Zabrinut, dečko ode kod svog oca da se posavetuje šta da radi. Otac će:
- Sine, ako je zaista voliš onda prodaj Lamborginija i Ferarija i kupi ta dva Mercedesa, ali da rušimo četiri sprata od kuće zaista je čista besmislica!
Mujo i Haso autom udarili u drvo. Mujo izleteo kroz šoferku.
Pružajući mu prvu pomoć na mestu nesreće, doktor ga grdi:
- "Da si bio vezan ne bi ispao! Vidi kako Haso lepo sedi, kao da je živ!"
Koja pesma je hit u Zvečanskoj?
Neće mama doći, neće nikada.
Zašto ljudožderi najviše vole jesti device?
- Jer nisu prskane.
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Duki
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« Reply #943 on: March 31, 2015, 06:19:34 pm » |
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motorista 57 klasa
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Да ли ћемо још коме сметати зато што смо своји?
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« Reply #944 on: April 01, 2015, 01:54:52 pm » |
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